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ManagementSpeak: We practice Agile methodologies in all of our business practices.

Translation: We practice haphazard methodologies in all of our business practices — we wait until the last minute, get the staff working on projects they have no skills for, and wonder why the results are the same as last time.

Thanks to today’s contributor, who demonstrated all the skills needed for interpreting ManagementSpeak.

ManagementSpeak: This merger will make us a stronger company. I’m very excited about it.

Translation: I’ve got a 50/50 chance of keeping my job. Most of the rest of you are toast.

Thanks to Conrad Macina, who observes that both sides call a merger a merger, but in an acquisition, the acquiring company calls it an acquisition; the acquired company calls it a merger.

ManagementSpeak: I guess my thinking at this particular point in time might be that it may be prudent to wait until such time as we could gain a better understanding of where we are going with this issue by studying it a little further.
Translation: I couldn’t make a decision if my life depended on it.
IS Survivalist Kevin Bevins wants us to study this remarkable phrase a little further.