Management Speak: We have a personality conflict.
Translation: You have a personality and I’m the only person in this organization who’s allowed to.
This week’s contributor is keeping his identity, rather than his personality, under wraps

Management Speak: You have the unique ability to describe technology in an easy to understand format.
Translation: We had no idea you were such a simpleton when we hired you.
Do you think IS Survivalist Riley T. Bell is sending me a message?